After my father dropped me off at the IIT Kanpur hostel, for the next 4 years, my parents did not even once ask about my grades.
Nor did they bother about my career plans, until one day I told them that I would be joining the IPS. And when I quit the IPS, they were totally cool with it.
Their approach always has been, “If you need something, we are here to support you, but you are in charge of your life. Do what is right.”
I never realized the value of this independence until I met this IPS batchmate of mine, who was a doctor by training. His dream was to practice medicine but his father, an ex-IPS officer, forced him to join the service.
Ultimately, my friend quit the IPS and moved to another country to again become a doctor. You cannot suppress the human spirit forever.
This hands-off parenting taught me a big life lesson: If you want something, pay the price — go through the grind. Earn it, and have it.
You have the freedom to shape your life. So don’t blame your circumstances, don’t complain. If you don’t like something, change it.
I think this is true for all of us. We are the captains of our ship — nobody will bail us out. There are no backup captains in this game.
It is our life. And we are responsible for what we do with it.
Responsibility is the price of freedom.