During my policing career, when interacting with very poor people, I would often notice an attitude of helplessness and resignation.
Life had probably battered them so much that they felt that nothing they did mattered. Martin Seligman, a renowned psychologist, called this ‘learned helplessness.’
Seligman did experiments where dogs in an enclosure were given a mild electric shock. While one group of dogs could stop the electric shock by pressing a lever, the other group couldn’t (their lever did not work).
The latter group learned that there was no point trying — these dogs would not try to escape shocks even when all they had to do was jump over a small barrier.
But here is the interesting thing — when experimenters physically lifted and moved these dogs to the non-shocking side of the enclosure repeatedly, some dogs started jumping over the barrier to escape the shock!
When people go through traumatic experiences, they might acquire learned helplessness and stop trying. But if someone (e.g., your boss) helps you realize that you are not helpless and can change your fate, you will regain your confidence.
Humans are not helpless and change is always possible. But we need kind people around us, who can help us realize that.
That is why, when you have the option, choose good people over everything else.
– Rajan